Mouth Management 101

James 3:1-12

Institute Class

 Introduction:

 

Today I read about a college student who was sitting in a concert hall listening to a soloist perform.  She did not sound good at all.  The young college student leaned over to the man sitting next to him and commented, “What a terrible voice, do you have any idea who that woman is?”

 

“Yes,” was the answer.  “She is my wife.”

 

“Oh, I’m sorry, please forgive me.  You know she really isn’t that bad, but the song she is trying to sing is brutal.  I wonder who wrote that awful song?”

 

“I did” was the answer.

 

If you are like me, you find that you get in the most trouble when you are criticizing others.  D.L. Moody was asked, why he didn’t criticize others, and he responded, “because I have enough problem with me, to be worried about others.”

 

It is not easy to control the tongue.  James gives some great insight into the control of the tongue, and he probably had plenty of experience in putting his foot in his mouth.  Being the brother of Jesus, he certainly said hurtful and critical things to Jesus growing up.  He did not believe in Jesus right away.

 

James talks about the tongue more than any New Testament writer.  Every chapter refers to the tongue.  Go to the Dr. complaining about not feeling well inside, and the Dr. will quickly ask you to stick your tongue out.  The tongue is also a gauge for spiritual health.

 

James 3:1-12 (NIV)  Taming the Tongue

Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. ² We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.

³ When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. ⁴ Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. ⁵ Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. ⁶ The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.

⁷ All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, ⁸ but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

⁹ With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. ¹⁰ Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. ¹¹ Can both fresh water and salt ^a water flow from the same spring? ¹² My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. ^[1]

 

Why does the teacher incur such a strict judgment?  More knowledge, more responsibility, and accountability.

 

What do we know about communication and the tongue?

Jesus communicated the importance of our speech when He said,

Matthew 12:35-37

35 The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36 But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”

NIV

 

Words Per Day:

A husband looking through the paper came upon a study that said women use more words than men.

Excited to prove to his wife that he had been right all along when he accused her of talking too much, he showed her the study results. It read "Men use about 15,000 words per day, but women use 30,000".

The wife thought for a while, then finally she said to her husband "It's because we have to repeat everything we say."

The husband said "What?"

 

Longest non-stop talker:

Harare, Zimbabwe (Independent Online): A Zimbabwean man on Saturday talked his way into what could be a new Guinness world record with a speech lasting 36 hours.

Jonah Mungoshi, a 35-year-old father of three and bank executive, beat the 26-hour record set by South African John Trevor Walker on his way to a personal goal of 36 hours of almost non-stop talk….  gee 36 hours is far longer than Durango works at his office in a whole month's time, that slacker

"I'm extremely excited but extremely sleepy as well," a visibly exhausted Mungoshi told reporters. "All I want to do now is go home with my wife to sleep."

 

Steve Woodmore:  in Sept 1991 I set the current World record for Fast talking, with a speed of 637 words per minute, I did this By reciting a 600 word passage from the "Tom Clancy" Novel "Patriot Games".  I actually spoke the 600 words in 56:01 Seconds, After adjustments were made for intelligibility my speed was Judged by Guinness World records to be 637 words per Minute.

 

James 1:19  "My dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry." NLT

Proverbs 10:19  "When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise." NIV

 

There are about 5,000 different languages spoken on Earth, and you can easily get yourself in trouble in every one of those languages if you don’t learn to control your tongue.

 

What does this passage teach us about the tongue?

 

Characteristics of Speech Habits:

I.      Our Tongues are Influential (James 3:1-3 )

James 3:1 Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.

James 3:2 We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.

James 3:3 When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal.

James 3:4 Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. ^[2]

A.     Tiny Bit

Controls the entire horse.  The horse can weigh 2-3,000 lbs, and the 95 lb jockey can have total control of a mighty horse with a small metal bit.  The jockey’s life

B.      Small Rudder

Queen Mary – 3 acres of recreational space, with an anchor weighing as much as ten cars.  A little rudder determines the direction of this great and mighty ship.  The tongue is the steering wheel.  It is the guidance system!

 

This two ounce slab of mucous membrane enclosing a complex array of muscles and nerves that enable our bodies to chew, taste, and swallow.  It also allows us to communicate.  Without the tongue, our ability to communicate would be absolutely limited.

 

Washington Irving said, “A sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use.”

 

The tongue does not look like the brutal beast that it is…  Neatly hidden behind ivory palace gates, it’s movements are an intriguing study of coordination.  It can curl itself into a cheery whistle or manipulate a lazy afternoon yawn. With no difficult it can flick a husk of popcorn just so.  And it is tricky!  It can help you enjoy the flavor of a stick of peppermint as it switches from side to side without once getting nipped.  Moments later it can follow the directions of a trumpeter, allowing him to play, “Flight of the Bumblebee” without a single miscue.  The tongue is amazing!  But watch out, it can have a life of it’s own.

 

Winston Churchill – moved a nation during WWII.

 

“I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears, and sweat.

Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be; for without victory there is no survival.

…we shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight in the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air; we shall defend our Island whatever the cost may be.

We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender; …”

He said to our president on February 9, 1941, during a radio broadcast: “Give us the tools, and we will finish the job.”

And I will never forget the amazing speech he gave to a very fearful people in Britain when he addressed the House of Commons on December 30, 1941. It included these words:

When I warned [the French] that Britain would fight on alone whatever they did, their generals told their Prime Minister and his divided Cabinet, “In three weeks England will have her neck wrung like a chicken.” Some chicken; some neck.

The Nazis never wrung England’s neck. Somehow Churchill, stubby little creature that he was, could stand in front of a microphone and strengthen Britons by the thousands with intrinsic motivation. He appealed to their zeal.

Adolf Hitler used his tongue to inspire an entire nation to do evil.

II.   Our Tongues are Inflamable (James 3:5-6 )

James 3:5 Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.

James 3:6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. ^[3]

 

A fire is indiscriminate.  It does not care what is in it’s path.  It burns everything from a card table to a mansion.  From the penthouse to the outhouse, fire plays no favorites, but destroys whatever is in it’s path.  This is true of those who slander and gossip about others.

 

The tongue can destroy.  Remember the saying, “sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never harm me.”  That is a lie!  Words can be incredibly vile and harmful.

 

Yosemite and Yellowstone National Parks are still scarred from forest fires that swept through years and years ago.  A single match can wipe out a mighty forest.  In Colorado a women set a blaze that cost firefighter lives because she was angry with her husband, and started a fire as a result.

 

Whole course – the tongue affects the entire person, direction and future.

 

“set on fire by hell” – this is serious stuff!  Wrong words can cause all hell to break loose!

 

Psalm 39:1 “I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth as long as the wicked are in my presence.” ^[4]

 

Proverbs 21:23 He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity. ^[5]

 

Publius, the Greek statesman said, “I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.”

 

Character Assassination?  Verbal murder?  This is what some do through slander and gossip.  They are committing verbal murder!

Celebrity Roast – spending time “burning” the honored guest?

 

Fire has great potential for good and for evil, depending upon how it is being used.

 

Because our tongues are inflammable, we need to heed the warning of Scripture as to how we speak…

Colossians 4:6

6 Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone. NIV

III.           Our Tongues are Independent (James 3:7-8 )

James 3:7  All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man,

James 3:8  but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. ^[6]

 

It is humanly beyond the mind to tame the tongue by human effort.  It is wild – like the lions at the Wild Animal Park in San Diego.  The animals are wild and need to be respected, or it could cost you your life!  Leo the Lion looks so tame!  Wild animals will seek to devour and destroy any potential food item.  They prey on those who least suspecting.

 

Be prepared to control your tongue.

 

Ephesians 4:29

29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. NIV

 

We are accountable and responsible for every word that we speak.  We are able to control giant animals and we cannot even control this little tongue inside of our heads.

 

If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all.

 

Proverbs 26:20-21

20 Without wood a fire goes out;

without gossip a quarrel dies down.

21 As charcoal to embers and as wood to fire,

so is a quarrelsome man for kindling strife. NIV

IV.            Our Tongues are Inconsistent (James 3:9-12 )

James 3:9 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness.

James 3:10 Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.

James 3:11 Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?

James 3:12 My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. ^[7]

 

Do you struggle with a tongue that is out of control?  Your tongue displays who you really are.  For the person who says, “that is not really like me”, or “I don’t know what got into me”, is not telling the truth.

 

The pump on a well only produces what is in the well.  You can paint the pump, and put cologne on the pump, and dress it up nicely, but the water it pumps out is determined by what is in the well itself.

 

The tongue simply reveals the character that is on the inside where it cannot be seen.

 

As is the root, so is the fruit.  Whatever is on the inside will eventually show on the outside.  My real problem is not my tongue, but my heart!  The tongue reveals my true character.  Fruit is the outward expression of the inward nature.

 

Jesus said, Matthew 12:34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. ^[8]

 

Colossians 3:8-10 "

8 But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. 9 Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator." NIV

 

Ephesians 5:3-4

3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. 4 Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. NIV

 

WHAT IS THE SOLUTION?

1.  Have a Change of Heart

What is on the inside will come out, so the only way to change things significantly is to start from within.

Ezekiel 18:31

31 Rid yourselves of all the offenses you have committed, and get a new heart and a new spirit. NIV

 

Jesus said that you must be “born again.”  This is a heart transformation.

 

2 corinthians 5:17  speaks of this new heart, "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new person.  The old has passed away. Behold all things have become new."

 

There is hope for those who have struggled with stinkin’ thinkin’.  God can give you a new heart, which results in a new tongue and a new power to live the Christian life.

 

David prayed in Psalm 51  "Create in me a clean heart, O God" because what is on the inside is going to come out somehow.

 

2.  Receive Help from God

The power to control the tongue must come from God.  It is too difficult a task to muscle out on your own.

Psalm 141:3

3 Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord;

keep watch over the door of my lips. NIV

 

Lord, don’t allow me to be a critical spirit today.  Help me Lord!

 

Sidlow Baxter:  "The proof that God's Spirit is in your life is not that you speak in an unknown tongue but you control the tongue you do know."  You watch your words, and God gives you the power to not slander, not lie, not exaggerate. 

 

Meditate on and memorize God’s Word so that you have some ammunition in this battle for the control of the tongue.  Like a computer, you only get out what you put in.  GIGO is an old computer term that means, “Garbage In Garbage Out.”

 

Philippians 4:8

8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. NIV

 

3.  Engage the Mind Before You Speak

James 1:19  "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."

 

Take the time to cool down and listen before you speak.  If you have an anger problem, learn to count to ten to think before you speak.  Once the words are out, there is no taking them back.  Like a fire that burns a forest, you can replant, but it takes years for things to get back to normal.

 

Our tongues control the direction of our lives.  Those who are positive and encouraging tend to be treated in a positive and encouraging fashion.  Those who are critical and bitter, are treated in like fashion.  Like a rudder or a bit, our tongues give us direction!

 

A rudder needs a strong and steady hand.  The jockey trains the giant horse with a strong hand on the reins.  To control the tongue, Jesus must have control of your heart.

 

It could be time to take responsibility for reckless words of the past.  It could be time to start afresh by asking forgiveness of those whom you have offended.

 

Conclusion:

Prayerfully ask God to give you a tongue that brings sweet blessings to those who know you.

 

Psalm 19:14

14 May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart

be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. NIV